We're all affected somehow. We've all lost something or someone at this point. Our close proximity to one another has diminished right beneath our fingertips and we now live differently. In a matter of weeks we lost seasons.
We lost our springtime, we lost sports seasons, prom season, graduations, time with loved ones and we lost a season of mourning the lives of those lost....because right now we can't even say proper goodbyes to those who have passed on. How do we recover from these losses? How do we move on from lost seasons? We don't. We won't forget, we won't ever be able to celebrate like we should have and we won't be able to grieve together. That doesn't mean it's okay, that just means that our new normal right now and that's the cards we've been dealt. It's not okay, it's not justifiable and none of this makes us feel good right now....but.....you are not alone despite the lack of people around you right now. We are in some way, shape or form together. Lots of other people in the world are experiencing what you are going through. Other people's businesses are closed, other people have lost loved ones and other people don't get to have their senior prom or their big wedding celebration (right now anyway). We have all lost during this pandemic and we are all continuing to lose. During this darkness is when transformation happens. This is when we tap into our heartbreak and find something new. The newness is not something I can tell you how to find or describe, it's something only you can find. Transformations don't happen during the good times or during the brightness, real change happens when we don't know where to turn next but somehow find a way to keep going. Change happens during the lost seasons.
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LIfe is funny. We all know that! Just when we think we can't go on and not sure what direction to turn suddenly God sends us a blessing. Today as we watched Governor Walz address Minnesota and shutdown our business until May 1st, I think it's safe to say we (Erin and I) were instantly overcome with sadness, fear and frustration. We weren't sure what to do next. We weren't sure what emotions to let the kids see and we weren't sure the answers to hardly any questions.
Hope had suddenly been lifted from our souls and from our lives, but since we have four kids and no choice but to figure out our next move we instantly starting figuring out the next step....the dreaded loan!! I can't put into words exactly how it happened, but I know that the moment I started filling out the paperwork I began to receive texts from clients offering to help pay other people's debts, friends asking for us to truly pursue online class offerings and best of all and most glorious of all, hope began to reform in my soul. That's what people do for one another. We lift each other up. We bring others up when they are down, we share our hope and blessings and we interact with one another. This week has been just as interesting for us as it has been for everyone else. I've been forced and blessed to take meetings online. We've restarted the process of taking our group fitness classes online and I've connected with people that I might have never connected (or reconnected) with. I'm a person that needs human interaction. I love communicating, brainstorming and learning from and with others. So when the social distancing guildelines went into effect I felt my soul shift. But the way it shifted surprised me. My wife and kids are my driving force, they are motivation and they are necessary for my daily existence, but I'm guilty of not always showing them or expressing that to them. So when we shut down Evolve U and began to stay at home with one another I literally felt my soul's fire begin to reignite and my love for them all begin to grow. Staying at home with them, while financially has been scary, I believe it was God's way of saving and growing relationships. Being under one roof has brought life back into our family and maybe even saved it in some ways. In times like this we begin to communicate and live with the people whom we truly love. The people who were bringing us anxiety, anger and sadness have suddenly (hopefully) exited our lives. And their exit has opened the door for love to explode for the ones that deserve our attention and our love. So let's do that! Let's share the love with those who deserve our blessings. Let's reach out a helping hand, a text or a phone call to those that TRULY matter in our lives. Let's begin our new normal with a momentous and intentional shift of our energy, our minds and our hearts. Until tomorrow my friends........NAMASTE How often do we read these words....Rise Up? Do we practice using them as we should? Do we know what those words even mean? I'm starting to learn...through the turmoil of what's going on in our world I feel like I'm truly learning what Rise Up means.
I've read numerous books from Brene Brown, I follow Glennon Doyle and engulf myself in the readings of the great philosophers and authors but it's times like now that really teaches me what their words mean. Tonight the words Rise Up hit me. As I opened an email saying my student loan payment had been deferred for the month, the words rise up came into my being. As we don't truly know what the fate of our business is, we don't truly know where our finances are and we have no clue what the future of anything looks like, it's time to call upon our faith in ourselves and in God. Because right now, in these tough moments are when God is shining through, it's times like these he is shining for us. When we aren't sure how to make a payment, a way is given to us. When we are feeling alone, we suddenly feel love from someone. When our motivation slips away.....he finds ways to scoop us back up. Maybe you aren't a huge Christian, maybe you just believe in a higher, loving power...and that's okay! Whatever it is that you have faith in....it's time for you to let that love and light rise up through you and into your life. Now is the time to rise up for yourself and the ones you love. When times are tough, like they are now, we have to find ways to move mountains in our lives and that movement is not from our own selves, but from the strength given and blessed upon us. So read the words again and again, repeat them over and over and let the words RISE UP bring new meaning and faith into your life. It's time my friends for us to be that for one another-be a friend! It's time to rise up as mothers, as daughters, as leaders and as human beings. Rise up and let love, strength and creativity shine! Today we were forced to close the doors of our business. This was a decision made by state officials and something we had absolutely no power or say so in. It's funny how life does that to you! When you think you have things under control and big plans for life, all of a sudden God says wait just a minute we're gonna head another direction.
Like many people I've talked to, I'm confused and bewildered by this whole thing. I have many unanswered questions and have had my life ripped out from underneath me. You see when a small business closes in a small town, the business owners financial stability is gone in an instant. There's no unemployment, there's no opening a new business tomorrow and there's no job offer waiting in our inbox. We got word on Monday evening while at our son's end of year hockey party that we had to shutdown our business in 24 hours. How do you even plan for that? How do we plan for next week not knowing if we will even be allowed to reopen on the date they are currently saying? It's funny. I've been struggling with faith for a few months. I've been questioning myself and how I feel about the world and then this happens. So how do we react? How do we find faith when the world is quite literally shutting down? I don't have an exact answer for that, but I can simply say keep trying to find the good. Keep your ears and eyes open for the good hearted people. Today when my wife and I enjoyed our last meal out together before restaurants closed for awhile, we found ourselves in tears as we listened to the owner of the restaurant call senior citizens in our area and ask if they had eaten today and what their plan is to eat tomorrow. On a day when her business was being closed, she was more concerned with the people in our community that might not have a meal than she was with her own situation. That's the attitude and approach we must ALL take. During this time we must turn our emotions and hearts to others. We must ask ourselves what we can do for other people. Can we prepare meals? Can we go grocery shopping? Can we just call someone and check in on them? I think finding our faith is in the service of others. It's knowing that while we don't know where our life stands next week or next month, we still have the ability to serve and help others. Not having answers is hard, its terrifying and it's sad-but like my wife has been saying.....how we hold it together during this time is knowing that we are not alone in this. There are others with the same struggles and fears and there are others in worse and scarier situations than us. Let our faith that we can help others take over the fear that is traveling through the world. The quote that Rotarians live by is "be the good in the world," and that is what we MUST ALL do right now. Faith over Fear! (even when you aren't sure what that means) Wow, it's been an entire year since I shared by thoughts with the world. So much growth, so many challenges and so many things have changed-and I know I'm not alone in all of this.
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Author35 year old mother, wife, fitness professional, entrepreneur, triathlete & lover of life! Archives
April 2020
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